Joy to the World

People are inconsistent. I have to remember that and remind myself that I am included in that statement. Doing so allows me to be tolerant in an intolerant world.

I had an interesting encounter with a fellow employee at the community college. A simple exchange of greeting turned into a sermon, which was totally inappropriate but got me thinking. 

The good Pastor announced that there are absolutes in life and proceeded to take a righteous path through his beliefs to support his position. Truthfully, I was a little stunned since the conversation began with him asking me what was new and me saying not much, it’s December and did he hear about the earthquake in the Sedona area? 

After I recovered from my surprise and really thought about what he said, I realized I don’t think that way at all. Not just about religion but about the over-simplified notion that there are absolutes. In my world most issues lie on a continuum somewhere between good & bad, right & wrong, etc. To my mind there are very few easy answers and that notion of certainty doesn’t resonate with me.

It would be nice if we could neatly box things up, wrap them and tie a pretty bow on it, but human behavior isn’t so easily classified and understood. It is disheartening that so many use religion as a way to separate and judge rather than unify and accept. Isn’t religious freedom for everyone? What about separation of church and state? Are those easy issues with absolute answers? Think about it.

This is the time of year when I begin to see posts on Face Book that state, “it’s Merry Christmas, not Happy Holidays!” That is an absolute statement and if someone wished me a Merry Christmas, I would respond in kind. But here’s the thing, I have friends who are Jewish, friends that celebrate Kwanzaa, Yule, Winter Solstice. When I choose a card to send, I choose one that is inclusive and just may say Happy Holidays! I want everyone to appreciate and enjoy what this time of year means to them and don’t see any reason to push my personal beliefs. Isn’t that what respect is about?

I think daily about the choices I make, how they shape and influence my life, relationships and work. I make an effort to be kind, compassionate and loving but sometimes I fail. Sometimes, I snap at my husband, swear in front of my daughter, find fault without fully understanding a situation. In an absolute world these things are bad and therefore, so am I. Who can feel good about themselves and others with perfectionism holding them down? No one.
I hold myself to high standards and hope others do as well but their standards may be different than mine. My priorities are mine alone. Luckily, they align with friends and family but we may call them by different names. A little tolerance goes a long way but sometimes it feels good to call someone an idiot. Why? We feel better about ourselves by comparison. All the talk of brotherly love, anti-bullying campaigns, diversity and inclusion is just talk until we learn to consistently embrace the beliefs we expound. So there you have it, I just found an absolute! Because I am, after all, human and inconsistent.
Just in case you need it...a little Church Lady